Recent Posts By: Calvin Chamberlain

Celebrate dad at MiniInTheBox and save $4 off $30 with code CMITB Suppose for a moment that you had a job at the local bakery, preparing day-old bagels for underpriviledged youth.  Every morning you dutifully set your alarm for 3:30 am, making sacrifices every day and putting a physical strain on your body just so [...]

Everything was right there for the Celtics.  They had reversed their regular season trend of giving up big leads late and stormed back on the Miami heat in no small part thanks to a herculean effort from Tony Allen.  It was about to be Capri Sun, orange slices, and breast implants down at Moose Knuckles [...]

It was 3 or 4 days ago or something, but I remember it like it was yesterday. The Lakers were playing the Nuggets on KCAL at the same time I had the opportunity to eat fresh at Subway.  Now, I know what you’re thinking. “Why doesn’t he just take advantage of Quiznos’ new delivery service [...]

NSS grand wizard Nick Gelso recently wrote an article in which he criticized the Celtics for not playing with the kind of passion that makes the team so hated.  This led me to consider the question: how hated are they, exactly?  This list ranks their roster 14-1 in order of reverse hatedness, nationally.  My personal [...]

In the wake of last night’s incredible national championship game, I experienced the euphoria one normally associates with opiates or auto-asphyxiation, without the unsightly rope burns that won’t even come out with Tide-to-go.  As I walked down Pedro Borbon street and reflected on the night’s events, a sad realization dawned on me:  that game was [...]

I had an overly affectionate dog once as a child. Sure, he was always trying to have sex with my various body parts, but she was mine. One day that dog got under the fence at the edge of our property. He chewed off all of the hair from the neighbor dog’s backside and proceeded [...]

In space, no one can hear you scream.   Which is really unfortunate for astronauts as there is no more of a comforting thought while being devoured by malnourished aliens looking for a source of calcium to fortify their strong bones than knowing at least somebody out there is listening in on your agony.  On the [...]

I’m not going to mince words with this one, whatever the hell that means. Remember those old blenders with 8 buttons that all did the exact same thing but made different noises? I believe one of them was mince. Much like my blender with ice, fruit, and juice, Stephen A has chopped, grated, grinded, stirred, [...]

This is a list of the top 10 players in the NBA.  The criteria is not who is most important to his team or who should take a final shot.  A player’s age is irrelevant, as this will only be a discussion of ability right now. Sure, I could do an article ranking MVP candidates, but [...]

In a classic tale of love gone right it would appear that Asian sensation Yao Ming has managed to impregnate his wife.  Meeting when they were both seventeen, Ye rejected Yao’s many attempts to secure a date because 7′ 6″ teenagers tend to be socially awkward.  But Yao persevered and eventually bought her love with [...]